Just For Today

I have been having so many good days, so many good conversations, and so many “healing” moments the past few months.

Not today.

I feel like I’ve taken huge steps backwards and that things I have been so sure about I am not so sure about. I have felt so sure that waiting to TTC was the right thing, or that although I don’t have kids right now that it will happen eventually.

Not today.

I worry if my marriage can survive this. There are days that we are so happy, and we never even mutter a word of infertility or miscarriages. There are days that I know he loves me despite seeing my every flaw and every break down and every bad day.

Not today.

Most days I feel like people understand what I’ve been through, and that they are there for me anyways. Most days I feels like when I mention my angels that people understand that although I wasn’t very far along that that doesn’t make them any less real to me, or any less deserving of remembering.

Not today.

Most days I feel like a happy bubbly person that everyone wants to be around.

Not today.

Most days I don’t feel completely alone.

Not today.

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