Yesterday I decided that I couldn’t sit at my desk for another minute. I wasn’t sure if I needed to cry or scream or just what all I knew is I didn’t want to do it sitting at my desk surrounded by co-workers. So after a wonderful lunch with a good friend I headed to Muncie. I decided that for the first time in about 9 years to go see my grandpa’s headstone. I think I just needed to feel something. I hadn’t cried about Melissa yet, I felt like I had emotion bottled up in me and that was the one place I knew I could let it all go. So I pulled in the very big cemetary not knowing exactly where to go, I have never been there by myself. Somehow I went right to it. The minute I pulled up emotion rushed over me. As I got out of the car the breeze took my breath away. I couldn’t control myself. For the first time in months I was letting go of all the emotions I had been keeping inside. I sat down next to the headstone and said a little prayer. Hoping that somewhere my grandpa could hear me.